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Just needed to vent somewhere...

3873 Views 37 Replies 23 Participants Last post by  JMcClure
Just need to vent somewhere.

Due to being cut back on hours for the winter months I was forced to really evaluate my income & bills and it is not pretty. I was only cut back to 40 hours/week but it is the first time this has happened to me in the 21 years I have worked where I do. I figured out that my monthly bills are $300-$400 more than what I would take home on a 45 hour week. I am not behind on any payments but the only thing getting me by right now is tapping leftover Christmas bonus and the income tax return that I will be getting. That will only last for just so long. Some of my debt is my own fault but most is not and is related to repairs or voluntary upgrades to my house that were done over the last 5 years. Just had to spend $5500 to replace my roof last fall because it was in BAD need of it in addition to other debt I already had. I also can't take a home equity loan since it would be lucky to be worth what I currently owe on it.

I have been stressing over this 24-7 for the past two weeks and I am pretty sure I am driving my girlfriend crazy with it. I pretty much have decided I have one of the following options, none of which are really all that appealing but may be necessary. I could sell my house and my girlfriend and I will each have to move back in with our parents for a while until our debts are paid or we could try to empty out two of the 3 bedrooms in my house and try to rent those out and hopefully that would be enough extra money to keep the bills paid AND pay down the excessive debt in a reasonable amount of time.

I have come to realize that I really SHOULD NOT have just spent the money I did on the 730 BBK on my green V but it's too late now. Unfortunately, it is almost certain I will have to sell my orange V which will mean she won't be able to ride with me anymore. I really want to do everything possible to keep my green V because that is really the only hobby or fun recreational activity that I do and it is really important to me. I have stayed home on Friday nights a LOT of times last summer/fall when my girlfriend was out with friends because I would rather spend the money on gas to go riding somewhere on Saturday than blow it on drinks in the bar.

I know there are lots of other people with similar problems but I just needed to vent as the stress of this is really eating me up. I haven't ever been in this type of situation and, frankly, I am angry, scared, and ashamed about it all at the same time.

Sorry for my long post and being so depressing...
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Do you want advice?
REAL advice or do you just want to tell me that it is my own fault?
start looking around for stuff you really don't need anymore and if is not junk thow it on ebay. I could not believe how much stuff I had saved over the years from older trucks.

A lot of old stuff went for more then I ever thought, but you never know until you try. A set of old lockouts that they don't make parts for any more. I figured $20-30. Almost got $200 for them.

Renting rooms can get tricky. I've had friends have good and bad expierence's with that. It helps pay the bills but can cause problems if you and the room mate don't mesh.
already ahead........

Do you want advice?
REAL advice or do you just want to tell me that it is my own fault?
Real advice!

First........You are way ahead of lots of folks.........You are smart enough to "check up" and take responsiblity. Many wait around and get surprised with an eviction notice.

Yeah, I want to get something handled before I am unable to pay for my bills. I am meeting with a credit counselor Monday so we'll see what he has to say.

I also don't want to get to the point that I am so worried about paying the bills that I don't spend the money I should to have the right food and don't really want to remove ALL fun in my life either.

If I could sell my house, moving in with my parents (my girlfriend would move back in with hers) would get me out of this the quickest. I know that I need to talk to my parents but it is SO embarrassing to do since I am 36 year sold and have been on my own since I was 21. I just can't believe how things (and the economy) can deteriorate so bad over 15 years. I got married when I was 22 (divorced at 24) and my first house was built brand new. My dad was the building contractor and we did a lot of work ourselves. I had to sell that house because I couldn't afford it anymore and now I can't even afford my much older house that is in the city.

This thread may seem to some that I am just looking for pity but I am really not. It would just be nice to express myself to some people who might not judge me too quickly because they really don't know me and there seems to be a lot of level-headed people here.
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selling stuff is just a quick temporary fix. Unless it's a monthly note type of deal

Really look at your expenses.

Cable/sat. TV.
cell phone
shit like that

you need a roof over your head, transportation, and food

it boggles my mind thinking about the stuff we think we need now days
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Your house is just a little out of order...............

Is your Mom and Dad well off?
I agree with Wild650. You'd be surprised how much people will pay for things that you think are relatively worthless.

Also, credit counselors can't do anything for your credit that you can't do on your own. Call your creditors and be honest. Tell them of the situation and see if they would be willing to take less money each month. Usually their feeling is "Some money is better than no money".

Relax. Take a deep breath and take each day as it comes. Good luck.
I have looked at my expenses and about the only thing I can find to cut out right now is the cable TV and possibly switching internet providers to a cheaper one. I really do need internet. My cell phone service is paid for by the company I work for. What is killing me monthly is the credit card bills. I am not using them anymore but they have some high balances that are probably 70% made up of house repairs/upgrades over the last 3-4 years. I will soon not be able to even pay the minimum payments and they will never get paid down by just paying minimums.

When I bought my house I never really intended on staying here more than 5-6 years. Shit happens and I am still here. My parents aren't "well off" but they are doing OK and my old room is empty as well as most of the finished basement. I could pay them a minimal amount of rent to cover the possible increase in utility bills that might occur if I lived there. I know that they would help me if I really needed it... they're my parents... but I have been procrastinating about talking to them about it.

By the way, thanks guys for talking to me about this.
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My advice is to go talk to your dad............tell him your situation......then tell him to be honest with you and tell you the truth about what you are doing wrong and what changes to make..........if you have to write it down what he tells you ....do it.........so you don't forget..........your dad is not going to tell you wrong and he has the help you need....................You might not like what he tells you concerning your girlfriend but listen and take his advice...............then things will change for the better..........
Sorry to hear about your problems.

First, get ahold of your Credit Card Co. and tell them your situation. See if they can work out some type of payment plan. With all of the defaults they have experianced over the last year or so, they are more willing to work with you. Don't give up on your first contact with them. If you don't like the way they are dealing with you, ask to talk to someone higher up.

Second, CUT THOSE CREDIT CARDS UP!!!! I know it is hard to believe that you can live without them, but you can. I got rid of all of my CC's 4 years ago and it was the best thing I ever did. They are just to easy to fall back on. Trust me, I had High balances and High payments. Once you get out from under them, you will find that where you used to use them because you didn't have the cash, you now have the cash. Plus, it will cut down on Impulse Buying. You will stop and think about whether or not you REALLY NEED something.

You aren't alone. There are a lot of people having serious finacial issues right now. There are several members of this Forum that are hurting right now and being forced to make some hard decissions. Just keep your chin up and deal with it head on. In the end, you have to do what is right for you. I wish you luck.
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Times suck right now..... My two cents are maybe consolidate your debt, one decent payment is allot easyer than 5 or 6 "minimum" payments that intrest eats up. Which is my next option call your credit company and tell them you can get a lower intrest rate from sombody else.... 9 times out of 10 they will lower your rate with just a 2 minute phone call. Good Luck!
Something that worked well for me in the past was to go to a straight cash budget. When you actually see the cash leaving your hand and you see your money shrinking it will really help you cut down on your spending especially discretional spending. I mean leave the debit card at home too. If you don't have the cash don't buy it. It's tough at first but you'll adjust.

Hey man I'm gonna tell ya, atleast your mature enough to admit there is a problem and take actions to correct it on your own. There are many over twice your age who don't do that.
What I did may not be the best thing to do. I took out a loan on my 401K and paid all the bull sh#$ stuff off and just make payment back to my 401. Oh and plus I get to keep the intrest.
Try using cash only (no debit card) and write down everything that you buy in a month... EX: candy bar, rented movie, out to eat

If you write it down by the end of the month you will really see how much $$$ you are wasting. Wasting may be the wrong word but trying to get your situation under control is what your goal is and this will help. It is never good hearing anything like this but it is relieving to hear someone that understands and is trying to correct it. If your sensible enough to identify the problem then your probably able to correct it or give it the best effort and know that you did. Good luck and stay strong.
Dave Ramsey Homepage - daveramsey.com

"Rice n Beans & Beans n Rice"

Read up on him, I listen to him on talk radio a lot. You won't like what he has to say, but hes a no BS guy.

Dave Ramsey Homepage - daveramsey.com

"Rice n Beans & Beans n Rice"

Read up on him, I listen to him on talk radio a lot. You won't like what he has to say, but hes a no BS guy.
Yep............Live like no one else so you can live like no one else!
Contact " Money Management International ". I was in the very same situation you are in right now. They are a non profit debt management group. They will get all your credit cards consolidated, lower your interest rates, and you will have just 1 monthly payment. Best thing I ever did.
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